dullara news Delaware Amateur Radio Association, Delaware OH   VOL 37 NUMBER 4

Bob

Dr. Bob Dixon, W8ERD

NEW DRESS CODE FOR ARES – ARE YOU PREPARED??

This comes directly from the state Emergency Coordinator, Mr. Spandex himself, Stanley S(pandex) Broadway! It has been noticed that our appearance at special events and emergencies leaves something to be desired, since we just carelessly wear whatever we have on at the time.  This has created a bad image for us, as several emergency officials have been observed snickering and pointing at us behind our backs. This is in cruel and sad contrast to our own heroic self-image. Taking a cue from the bicyclists and other well-dressed athletes we come in contact with, it has now been decreed by Mr. Broadway that we will all wear a special Spandex outfit to make us really look professional. He is confident that we will set an example for all other ARES groups across the country, and it will be only a matter of time before the ARRL itself adopts this groundswell of enthusiasm to become standard practice in all their publications, as well as all their Newington staff at work. He says there is no doubt that many early adopters will already be seen among the attendees and flea market vendors at the upcoming Dayton Hamvention. We will be making a special Spandex order for those who do not already have their outfits. Personal measurements will be taken by Mr. Broadway at our next meeting, to insure the necessary tight fit.  A little mini-clinic curtain will be provided, to ensure privacy.  Mr. Broadway will be modeling his own personal Spandex leadership outfit, which includes extra pockets for multiple radios and extra batteries, and an attached fixture for his overhead antenna. In the event that our voices may be raised in pitch somewhat by the tight fit, Ken has assured us he can re- tune the audio circuits in the repeater to compensate for this. Your nice new spandex outfit will fit nicely in the Go boxes, for safekeeping and to be sure it is always ready for you in a flash.   Optional Appendix – Individual photos of the ARES Super Stars.