DELARANEWS
Craig
Craig Miller, W8CRSticking it to the Deer Fly
I am aware that every month you readers look forward to perusing my latest article delving into analysis of highly sophisticated radio communication technology and guidance for achieving perfection in the art of radio communications. This month, with the advent of Field Day quickly approaching, I will offer potentially life saving information when exposed to the riggers of outdoors tasks such as stringing antennas or enjoying the environment just outside your back door. Nothing ruins a pleasant outdoor experience than being attacked by dive bombing, Kamikaze style attacks of the useless Deer Fly. These aggressive creatures populate wooded and wet locals, such as ponds, and favor targeting your noggin, first circling, sizing up their pray and then diving in. They are so obsessed with the extraction of your blood they get tangled in your hair as well as attempting to land on your eyes and in your ears. Their bite is none-to-pleasant to say the least, somewhere between a mosquito and a horse fly. They are very fast and often escape unscathed as you wallop yourself with an open hand. Sure, there are some products on the market that claim they repel these ruthless creatures, but all that does is allow them to live another day laying in wait for their next unsuspecting target. My motto: “The only good deer fly is a DEAD deer fly”. Here’s a solution that not only eradicates the local deer fly population but sports fashion sense as well as keeping the sun out of your eyes. Using an inexpensive disposable painter’s cap, I crisscross ordinary fly paper anchoring the ends with a single staple. Sure, your fingers get gooey but it’s worth the effort. Dawn your new attractive chapeaux and go about your normal outdoor activities. These stupid idiots continue to orbit your head and then dive on in for a tasty meal, only to be surprised and outwitted by a superior intellect. Challenge your spouse, kids and neighbors to see who collects the most flies over a weekend. A little side-wager always adds spice to any competition. I recently set a personal record this past weekend, apprehending and eliminating these dreaded creatures from the world. I count 25 confirmed kills over a 48 hour period. A feat I may never exceed. In fact, this hat may be prominently displayed in the living room or trophy case for all to enjoy. [Editor note- yes, these small, helpless creatures were injured and destroyed in the making of this article. And it served them right!! ]
DELARANews
Craig
Craig Miller, W8CRSticking it to the Deer Fly
I am aware that every month you readers look forward to perusing my latest article delving into analysis of highly sophisticated radio communication technology and guidance for achieving perfection in the art of radio communications. This month, with the advent of Field Day quickly approaching, I will offer potentially life saving information when exposed to the riggers of outdoors tasks such as stringing antennas or enjoying the environment just outside your back door. Nothing ruins a pleasant outdoor experience than being attacked by dive bombing, Kamikaze style attacks of the useless Deer Fly. These aggressive creatures populate wooded and wet locals, such as ponds, and favor targeting your noggin, first circling, sizing up their pray and then diving in. They are so obsessed with the extraction of your blood they get tangled in your hair as well as attempting to land on your eyes and in your ears. Their bite is none-to-pleasant to say the least, somewhere between a mosquito and a horse fly. They are very fast and often escape unscathed as you wallop yourself with an open hand. Sure, there are some products on the market that claim they repel these ruthless creatures, but all that does is allow them to live another day laying in wait for their next unsuspecting target. My motto: “The only good deer fly is a DEAD deer fly”. Here’s a solution that not only eradicates the local deer fly population but sports fashion sense as well as keeping the sun out of your eyes. Using an inexpensive disposable painter’s cap, I crisscross ordinary fly paper anchoring the ends with a single staple. Sure, your fingers get gooey but it’s worth the effort. Dawn your new attractive chapeaux and go about your normal outdoor activities. These stupid idiots continue to orbit your head and then dive on in for a tasty meal, only to be surprised and outwitted by a superior intellect. Challenge your spouse, kids and neighbors to see who collects the most flies over a weekend. A little side-wager always adds spice to any competition. I recently set a personal record this past weekend, apprehending and eliminating these dreaded creatures from the world. I count 25 confirmed kills over a 48 hour period. A feat I may never exceed. In fact, this hat may be prominently displayed in the living room or trophy case for all to enjoy. [Editor note- yes, these small, helpless creatures were injured and destroyed in the making of this article. And it served them right!! ]
